I suck. They had a poll over at XXLMag.com today asking visitors who their favorite blogger was and I got the least amount of votes. Fugg it though, thank you to the 4.7% that showed me some love. Honestly, I didn't even know they even had this poll going on. I guess that shows how much I pay attention at work. The hell with it though, to quote my homie Sean Falyon, "hate all you want, but I like my shit."
I case you've missed some of the finer moments (according comment count and comment relevancy) at my XXL Blog, here are some links so that you can join the 4.7%.
Today the Steeler Nation lost an important voice, Myron Cope. Cope called games for the Steelers for 35 years acting as the voice for some of the franchises most memorable events (excluding the "Immaculate Reception." He left the booth early to go to the field to do post-game interviews). Cope was also the inventor of the famed Terrible Towel. His nasally voice will always be remembered as one of the most distinctive ones to ever enter a broadcast booth. Prayers go out to his family and the rest of Steeler Nation.
Dammit, its starting already. Mike Bibby hasn't been point guard for the Hawks for a full two weeks, hell he hasn't even played a home game yet and the socialites are already trying to sink their claws into him. See, this is how you can tell nobody is originally from here or raised here. Because, if you were an Atlantan who actually gave a damn about the Hawks, you wouldn't promote this kind of behavior. I called it two years ago, Atlanta's nightlife is one of the biggest reasons why the Hawks can never stay focused.
I mean, I could see if we was out trying to get the other team drunk but that's hardly ever the case. Only time I've seen that go down was when Tyronn Lue used to take the other team's point guard to the club and get them fucked up, it worked in our favor maybe twice. But since he's gone, that's probably not going to happen anymore. Plus, I ran into one of the players that he got drunk at the club down in New Orleans. When we joked about the whole ordeal, he said "never again."
But to see that there are two parties (that I know of) welcoming Bibby to Atlanta, this can't be good. Sure, he's been in the league for 9 years but he's played for Vancouver and Sacramento. I've never been to either of those places, but I'm betting that they don't have club scenes like Atlanta.
We're just coming off a disappointing 5-game West Coast trip where we finished 1-4. The last place Bibby needs to be is in the damn club. I'm considering going to these spots just to discourage Bibby from going out. I might tell him some shit like "these hoes got the package" or "these niggas be gay" or "the KKK still be outside!" I know hearing shit like that has kept me in the house before, it just might work on him.
On a side note, Yao Ming just went down for the rest of the season and I really hated to see that. I "fucks" with Yao. I'm sure he's pissed too.
Oddly, this is supposed to be an anti-energy drink. Why I want to drink some shit to slow me down, I don't know. Maybe folks will start drinking this instead following Dave Chapelle's advice when they need to go to sleep.
I've actually seen this on sale at the Amaco on Boulevard (cocaine on Boulevard, go figure). I wanted to try it just for the sake of conversation, but I got some grape Fanta instead.
So, which would you rather ingest? Drank or Cocaine. One slows you down, the other speeds you up...what's your drug of choice?
This past weekend was my first one back in Atlanta since All-Star Weekend in N'Awlins. Naturally, my expectations were raised. I didn't find much to get into other than an artshow off Ponce. I didn't stay there long because well, I didn't really like the pieces. The artists featured are dope, but, the stuff I saw that night, yeah, not my favorites.
Bored, I just decided to ride around and see what I'd run into. Lo and behold I saw a sight I hadn't seen in at least a year. The infamous Krispy Kreme light!
For those of you who don't live in Atlanta or have never been, you probably don't realize just how serious this shit is. The Krispy Kreme "HOT" light to some of us, is like watching the New Year's Eve ball fall in NYC.
As soon as I saw it I exclaimed "aw shit!" and busted a sharp left into the parking lot. As soon as I did that, other drivers followed suit, totally disregarding the traffic around them, hoping to get a taste of one of the South's finest exports.
Once inside, the aroma of those diabetes inducing donuts was undeniable, I got a dozen of them for me and my friend. I called myself being healthy by washing them down with water instead of lemonade.
Anyways, by the time we sat down and started eating the donuts, the place was getting packed. At times, it looked like folks was having their family reunions there. Kids was running around the place like they were at Disneyland or something.
Krispy Kreme also has a large display window where you can actually see the donuts get made. You should have seen the looks on the faces of these folks (myself included).
Standing in that line, man, I heard one of the funniest things ever.
This little kid asked his dad about the part of the machine that actually glazes the donut. And then, I swore dude channeled the spirit of Homer Simpson and replied: "That there son, is the curtain of happiness..."
Hahahahahhaa...I felt him though, that glaze is not a game.
I actually forgot how good those damn donuts were. I also forgot how entrenched they were in Atlanta's culture. Honestly, I stopped fucking with alot of Atlanta "food" spots after I worked at The Varsity during Christmas vacation back in '99. I realized that alot of Atlanta's "food" places are unhealthy as hell. Fugg it though...you only live once.
I woke up and did my usual internet surfing this morning and came across a youtube clip Erik Parker's The Parker Report. I've been peeping it from day one when it was just that, a youtube clip. Now, the show has been picked up by MTV Jams, props on that. The subject on this clip is Lil' Young rappers.
Watching this clip reminded me of two things. One, just how smart dumb David Banner can be sometimes. He should really consider being a lawyer or public defender or something, lord knows his rap peers could use one. Two, just how much I need to go ahead and start me a show or something, I was clowning on this subject a while ago on my old myspace blog. Surely, there is nothing new under the sun, but I've been noticing that random shit I've ranted on ions ago is starting to pop up in editorials and television shows. I once heard that if you have an idea in your head and you don't use it, it will hop into someone else's head. Maybe that's whats going on lately.
Here is the old joint from the myspace blog, written 5/4/06
Am I Getting Old? Maybe a Lil' Bit Current mood: amused
[Claimer: Maur!ce Is Still Crazy wrote this blog under the spell of Red Bull and Chocolate Chip granola bars. So he may come off as Lil' crazier than usual.]
Man, Damn...
I really think that I'm turning into a 25-year old crank. Lil' shit is really starting to get on my nerves. What kind of Lil' shit you ask? Just that exactly, Lil' shit.
Everyonce in a while my mind drifts off to a time when I learned certain things about life, love and economics from Hip Hop and Rap music. It tends to drift when I get bombarded with music and messages that leave me empty handed. Of course, I like to go out and have a good time every once in while, like when I'm showing a visitor around or happen to be out with a young lady, but the balance is really effed up right now when you think of message music as opposed to party music...
Okay, let me get to the point...
In between listening to the radio, reading a couple magazines and surfing the internet (I'm proud to say that my TV diet is of Kate Moss proportions; the NBA Playoffs are my only vice right now), I realized that there are alot of young people running rap right now. I'm not talking about execs that are under 40 or 19-year old DJs. I'm talking about the artists.
Why are so many rappers naming themselves as if they are children? Every other artist is calling themselves Baby-who, Lil'-this or Young-that. And guess what? Most of them talk about childish shit.
Look at my toys=Look at my Benz, Chain; my Benz and my Chain
Why won't you be my friend=Ya'll niggas hatin' on me
I want my mommy=I hate ya'll hoes
Hey man, I got some candy=I sell the most dope on the block
Do you like me check YES or NO=You fuckin'?
You're a tattle tell=STOP SNITCHIN'
so on and so on...
Am I living up to my "still crazy" moniker for thinking/seeing this? Am I the only one?
What happened to naming yourself something with authority? Big Daddy Kane, Big Mike, Big Gipp, Big Boi, Big Syke, Notorious B.I.G., Large Professor, Grandmaster Flash, UltraMagnetic MCs....shid, Father MC or dare I say it Master P and King George (maybe too much of a stretch there).
I used to look at cats like that as if they had some kind of grown-man nature about themselves, hell I used to look at rappers like that in general because most of them had something to offer the mind as it relates to growth.
But all this Lil Young shit is starting to get on my nerves. So much that I really want to commend Bow Wow for dropping the Lil from his name; but I won't.
Where did it all come from? A friend told me they think it started with Jay-Z, a 30-something year old man, calling himself Young Hov and Hovi Baby. Which may be true. A dude that can kill the throwback-era with one sentence surely has enough power to make everybody under his voice think of themselves as young.
Its funny, as I'm typing this a pop up saying "5 DVDs $25" pops up and I see the cover for Baby Boy in the pile. Remember the opening when Tyrese, er, Jody was talking about how we call our woman our "girl," our friend our "boy," and our home our "crib." I guess thats what Hip Hop music is suffering from...a struggle to grow the fuck up. That becomes evident everytime someone like Russell Simmons, who turns 50 next year, insists that Hip Hop and Rap music is for the youth and the kids.
I still have hope tho...hopefully another grown voice will come about to bring some balance and fatherhood, or even motherhood, to this thing we call Hip Hop.
But I swear man, the way its looking right now...by the end of the year someone gonna come out calling themself The Fetus....yeah Young Lil' Fetus...it gets no realer than that.....I wonder what they will talk about.
Blaring Contridiction or Perfect Imperfection: I am a Little Brother fan
So...I got in from the N.O. yesterday. I had a ball. But more on that later.
When I got plugged back into the matrix, I got lead to a sneaker blog talking about some "Vintage Nike Terminators." I was intrigued because Terminators, along with Dunks and Blazers, are some of my favorite Nikes.
From looking at the pics, "vintage" must be the new shit this year. Evidently "vintage" means that it doesn't just look like a throwback, it means that they actually look old.
I saw some "vintage" Converse's like this too over the weekend and they wanted $200 for them. I don't know how much these Nike's cost, but I think its safe to assume they will be above the $80 range...which is a damn shame.
I have these sneakers sitting in my closet right now. I only paid $40 for them at that Athlete's Foot that used to be in the Kroger off Cascade about 3 years ago. And guess what...mines were new!
I'm seriously thinking about going down to Little 5 Points to see if I can lure some suckers into buying these old ass sneakers off me. I still wear mines from time to when I'm going to the store or running errands. They are still in decent enough condition to do everything but cut the grass in. Shood, since stale is the new fresh...I just might wipe these things down, go get some blue laces and wear them today!
Contrary to that popular movie title...it does look like there is a "Country For Old Men." Is it me, or has the last week or so of trades in the NBA given you flash backs of the damn 1993 Draft? I swear I'm feeling like I'm in middle school again.
Shaq to the Suns and now Kidd to the Mavs? Damn, Pau Gasol got the West shaking in their boots like that? DAMN! Evidently dumb must be the new smart in the NBA. It seems like General Managers are scrambling to see who can pull off the most lopsided trade. That can be the only explanation for the madness that's occurring right now.
I'm also laughing at the fact that Devean George is trying to block the trade. Nigga please, you went 0 for 11 last night. You've spoken your piece sir!
Speaking of the NBA, I'm headed to New Orleans in a couple hours to do the damn thing down there. Seems like a lot of folks are scared to come down for it. I can think of a couple reasons why. But, I plan on going down there to work and stay my ass in the hotel room...and stay far away from Jazze Pha.
...oh and case you're wondering. Boogie is telling the truth, Maurice Garland really is a nigga who steals shopping carts from Wal-Mart, more on that later...
WOW. So, the homie Jayski put me up onto something today. He sent me a link to a comment on NahRight.com where someone (Phuque) was joking that I "sold them a bootleg copy of Big Doe Rehab." I responded, and they responded right back. I thought that was it, but little to my knowledge, I was coming in on the back end of a joke that's been going on since this morning.
Evidently, my comment on the Nas-Nigger/Cunninlynguist commercial on NahRight.com has spawned off a chain joke where my name is the butt of it. Some call it getting "ethered" but I'm not tripping at all, this shit is funny as hell, here are some of my favorites:
Maurice Garland sound like a nigga who owe child support.
Maurice Garland sound like a nigga who go to his trunk during an arguement.
Maurice Garland sound like somebody in every rapper’s entourage.
Maurice Garland sounds like that nigga who pumps your gas while smoking a cigarette.
Maurice Garland has ‘DJ Quick hair’
Maurice Garland sound like a family member that only show up during cookouts and holidays.
Maurice Garland sound like a nigga that used Duke kits in his hair until ‘98.
Maurice Garland sounds like he sold drugs with Jay-z back in the day
Maurice Garland is Barack Obama’s government name.
Maurice Garland is a baby’s father in 39 of the 50 states.
Maurice Garland sound like a nigga who used to do security at Bobby Brown concerts.
Maurice Garland is always the first suspect the police call when there’s a murder….
Maurice Garland probably used to take your car to run errands, lol…
Maurice Garland looks like the nigga that’ll steal your house when you ain’t looking…lol
This thing goes on and on and on...and it spreads through at least 3 or 4 different posts. Some even include links to pictures of what people think I look like. I really don't know what to say other than DAMN! I wish I was a rapper! This would be great publicity, ahahhahhaa. I guess ya'll can join in if you want, its probably dead by now though...
Straight up...I've been B.S.ing on blogging on Cunninlynguists' latest album Dirty Acres. I've been B.S.ing on blogging period, I got alot of music and pics I've been sitting on, I apologize. But, this CL shit,iIts been getting play in the ride for months now and sadly, no one knows of this exceptionally dope album (or group). This new commercial just may make me have to flex some fanhood for the guys. Peep it...its my laugh for the day!
.JPG)
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